We celebrated my mother’s 80th birthday today. Thinking about this milestone, I am rather melancholy as I wonder how much longer she’ll be with us. I can easily see another 10 or even 20 years, she’s that strong of a woman!
I wonder where I’ll be 30-40 years from now. Certainly my mother can look back with a happy heart that she lived a great life and did the right things. Me, not so much. There are many, many regrets. But my race to the finish isn’t over with.
In some ways, I’ve lagged behind everyone else. I had children late, got my degrees late and now, time to really live, late. Why? Maybe it’s my cautious nature, the wait, see, and analyze part of me. Is it fear, logic or common sense that makes me hesitate and slow to change or take action? I don’t know.
Maybe I’m like the tortoise, in “The Tortoise and the Hare” and eventually I’m going to win, for once. I plod through life until I finally reach that finish line. All I know is eventually I want to look back, like my mother, and smile satisfyingly at where life has brought me.