I sobbed after hanging up the phone. I looked at my husband and said: “I got the job!”
The past three weeks have been emotional ones. After working at the same company for nearly 24 years, I said a tearful goodbye to my coworkers on Friday, February 9th.
I wasn’t really job hunting, but after years of frustration from low pay increases and no profit-sharing for who-knows-how-long, I thought to myself “I wonder what I’m worth?”
My new company was able to exceed every benefit that my former company offered, including 5 weeks of vacation, which shocked me. The benefit of being European owned, I guess! In addition, they have better insurance, better dental, vision, life insurance, more paid holidays, higher school reimbursement, and a higher 401k match. Not to mention a nice pay increase. Wow!
I can wear jeans every day. I have a wonderful office! No more cube farm for me! In the same building there is a restaurant, coffee shop, floral, ice cream, spa, hair, nails and a gym. Next door is an upscale strip mall. I have underground parking, protected from the elements. Can I just say this place is amazing?
But all of this comes at what cost? The friendships I forged with my co-workers over the years are irreplaceable. They are my family, I was heartbroken when I left. There is quite the guilt that I feel at leaving an increased workload for my former colleagues, who were already strapped and overworked… Why do I feel like a traitor?
On the other hand, I feel betrayed by my former company’s management. We were so close to working out a counter offer, but they wouldn’t budge on a trivial amount. What will my leaving them cost them in the long run?
The weekend before my start date (Feb 11th) was agony. The uncertainty of my decision cut through me and twisted in my gut like a knife. I was leaving the safety, comfort and routine of a known job, into uncertainty and unknown. This is not a position I like to be in. I prefer the familiar security of the known or a controlled, well thought-out adventure.
So here I am, one week into my new job. It is in EVERY way better so far. I am shocked! It honestly seems it might just be my dream job. It is in the same industry I used to work in, but a different product line, and a focus on only one product, rather than multiple products. Was this a good decision? Time will tell.
It will be 50% travel eventually. Good fodder for writing, right?! The commute is the only downside, with some days taking an hour, depending on traffic. If it turns out to be as good as I hope, it will be so worth the long drive.
One thing I find reassuring, is that my office is in an old, large, converted manufacturing facility that my father used to work at. The history of the building and the architecture style gives me a melancholy, but reassuring feel, it leaves me wondering if I walk the same steps and places as my father did, decades before.
Apparently, God thought the time was right for this change, and I think (for once) I agree with him. For a long time now, I have been in a steady holding pattern where nothing ever changes for the better, it seemed. I was heartily praying for something new, but when it happened it sure caused me turmoil and restlessness.
Push through the fear and resistance to change!
Things are changing for the better, finally. Let’s face it, life is cyclical and full of ups and downs, and after a rough road, I pray this is my upswing.
Many of you know my life’s bible verse:
PS 27:14 Wait and hope for and expect the Lord; be brave and of good courage and let your heart be stout and enduring. Yes, wait for and hope for and expect the Lord.
The time for waiting is done, now it is time to be brave and courageous, for my new adventure is at hand.
Have you also been waiting, wishing for more? Is it your time to step away from the comfortable and into the adventure zone too? Pray, step out, take a risk and see!